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Første brev fra DIS

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Vore noter om brevet.

Dawn sendte os et kopi af brevet. Dawn har givet sin tilladelse til at offentliggøre brevet.

Da Dawn skrev brevet, vidste hun ikke, at vi faktisk havde besluttet at standse som værtsfamilie måneder i forvejen.

Det har vi naturligvis meddelt hende efterfølgende.

Det gør ikke Dawns beskrivelser ringere, men det har muligvis inspireret direktør Anders Uhrskov, DIS,  til at insinuere, at vi havde påvirket vore tidligere studerende til at skrive breve! 

(Det første år efter sagen var startet, troede direktør Anders Uhrskov, at formålet med vores klage var at betvivle hans ret til at fravælge os som værtsfamilie.)

Den, der har rejst anklagen, er her anonymiseret som D eller Danielle.

Spørgsmål og kommentarer er velkomne på

family@dishostfamily.dk

2008-03-12 version 1.4e

 "Offentliggøres" med Dawns tilladelse.  Teksten ordret citeret:

"It has recently come to my attention that DIS has removed Leif Olsen and Kirsten Mahr from their list of families eligible to host students for DIS. My heart sinks at the thought, and I am sure that a very serious mistake has been made to the detriment of many students to come.

I was a student in Copenhagen during the spring semester of 1998. My college, Whittier College, has a special arrangement with DIS, and I had decided somewhat at the last minute to go; frankly, I didn't even know where Denmark was on a map. But I needed to get away from my home in southern California, and I was excited about the courses I would be able to take, which were unlike anything I would possibly find here.

I was also excited at the opportunity to stay with a Danish family. My letter to the housing director at the time was, as I remember, quite candid and very specific. Although I confess to having been a little nervous about placing my happiness and comfort in the hands of someone so far away, who have never met me, I was sure my detailed explanation of myself and my needs would help her finding me a good match.

My grandmother died during my time in  Denmark, and I took a week to go home and be with my family. Leif and Kirsten were very supportive of my decision to do so, and helped me with the difficulty of rearranging the plans I had already made to go to Praque with a friend. They made the whole process very easy and painless, which I needed because my grief was quite deep. My family was also very moved by their having offered to tell me what had happened so my parents wouldn't have to-a gesture of great kindness and sensitivity.

I understand that Leif has been accused of sexually assaulting a female student-indeed, of raping her. I consider myself to be a responsible and conscientious feminist, so I would never treat such a thing lightly. However, it is beyond my power to imagine that Leif could have done such an appalling thing. The very idea is absolutely preposterous. I spent a great deal of time alone with Leif in the house, and had other female students over to spend the night, and not once did I feel uncomfortable or unsure about his integrity. In fact, I later hosted Leif and Kirsten in my own home in California, where the opportunity for such a thing would have been much greater, and of course no such thing took place.

As I write this letter, I look past my computer screen to my desk, where a picture of Kirsten, sitting outdoors, smoking a cigarette and laughing, sits in a black frame. Just inside my door is a frame of six photos from my trip to Denmark, which include Leif and the dog, Kathy, and another of Kirsten laughing in the garden. I see their faces every day, and remember their generosity and kindness. Now that I'm a bit more mature, I wish I had the trip to do over again, so I could more fully take advantage of their friendship and companionship. And I had hoped their stunning record (now at thirty-five students) as host parents would only continue to grow. While I was with them, they frequently received mail from former students, updating them on their lives, and they even received an invitation to a wedding in Pakistan! The entries in their guest book were usually very enthusiastic and warm, which I expected.

It is my hope that this letter will help to give you a fuller picture of what Leif and Kirsten are like as host parents. In speaking with other students in the program at the time, I learned that my experience was somewhat unique in the appropriateness of my family for me and also in their wonderful presence as people. I felt very much a part of their family, and extremely grateful for everything they did to make me feel safe and welcome. From my discussions about philosophy with Leif at the kitchen table to my visit to her sister's Danish farm with Kirsten, I was continually surprised and impressed by Leif and Kirsten. I could go on for several more pages to describe specific events and memories which illustrate the happiness and encouragement they shared with me during my stay.

My hope is that DIS will reconsider this decision and more carefully investigate this matter; I am sure there must be a mistake. I know that in this country it has happened too frequently that perfect honorable and intelligent men have been falsely accused of assault and rape. I have full confidence that there must be some kind of misunderstanding in this case as well. While it is necessary to take women's concern seriously, we must not go so far as to assume that an accusation is the same as evidence.

Please feel free to contact me at any future time if you have questions or need more information from me. I am more than willing to help if I can, and particularly if I can help to resolve this conflict between DIS and Leif and Kirsten. I will gladly provide more information to you, in further correspondence or in a more formal interview, if necessary.

Please know that I write you in all sincerity and with best wishes.